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Sensitivity and the Modern Guy

Upon some reflection, a prominent characteristic of mine springs to mind:

I am rather sensitive.

Sensitivity, in my context, is not a stereotypical nod to notions like daily red wine sipping, indulging in manicures, or shedding tears during sentimental films – although I concede that “Parenthood”, “Big Fish”, “She’s Having a Baby”, and “Toy Story 3” tend to tug at my heartstrings. Instead, my sensitivity implies a heart-on-the-sleeve honesty and transparency that, for better or worse, is wholly me. Those who have had the pleasure, or perhaps misfortune, of personal encounters can vouch for this emotional candor.

In my willingness to voice opinions, I occasionally cause inadvertent discomfort, or intentionally stir the pot just for the sheer thrill of it. If you rub me the wrong way, there's no subterfuge, no veneer of niceties, you'll know about it. This predisposition may be attributed to my Italian lineage, or more likely, it stems from past experiences of dismissal and disrespect. Either way, I find myself less tolerant and more assertive as I age. Needless to say, this doesn’t always translate well in a professional environment.

I recall my grandfather's belief that hard work would invariably be rewarded, a principle I was determined to uphold. My dedication led me to spend a decade in the Navy, rapidly advancing to the rank of E7 before transitioning to academia. Embarking on my tertiary education journey at 27, I earned a BA in Psychology, a Master’s in Public Administration, and eventually an MBA. While I was proud of these achievements, they weren't always met with the respect I anticipated. The incident that comes to mind was my first week at a new job, where an ineptly composed email, sent by a fellow MBA holder, was circulated. It was dismissed by my supervisor as evidence of the deterioration of my intellect upon obtaining an MBA – a blow to my pride and an inauspicious introduction to my new workplace.

You might wonder, “John, what does any of this have to do with triathlon?” Well, it turns out that the correlation is quite significant, given my heightened sensitivity. The sheer effort I put into training for these races should not be dismissed. Yes, I am yet to reach the top 10 in my age group, but that doesn't give others the right to dismiss me as unworthy of competing. The elitist mentality that some athletes possess seems to wish for an exclusive triathlon club, devoid of those they deem unfit for the challenge. It is an alarming attitude I've encountered on the race track and in social media spaces.

The same people who deride my race capabilities are those who speed past me on the cycling track, not bothering with a customary "on your left" warning. While I understand their frustrations to some degree, equating us with those who are obliviously dangerous is, in my view, unjust. I, too, have experienced annoyance with swimmers blocking my path, or slower runners clogging the route during a half marathon. I sympathize with their grievances against Ironman races introducing rest rafts on their swimming courses, as it seems more like a ploy for advertisement rather than a safety measure.

However, that doesn’t justify the presumption that pre-race anxiety indicates unreadiness. Despite my physical setbacks, I have completed every race, even if I finished last. This is a claim that not many elites can make.

In recent times, I've noticed a growing intolerance on social media platforms. It's as if we've taken a step backward, reducing every difference of opinion to a binary of for or against, reminiscent of the political rhetoric from a decade ago. Disagree with the status quo, and you're slapped with an "un-American" label, leaving no room for rational, nuanced discussions that could potentially change minds. This polarized attitude has permeated social networks, giving birth to a culture of invulnerability that allows people to spew insensitive remarks without fear of repercussion.

Furthermore, our culture seems to have developed a hyper-sensitivity, amplifying the impact of otherwise innocuous words and phrases. A mere use of the word "stupid" is considered offensive. It’s crucial to understand the difference between making a stupid comment and being a stupid person. Politicians, who are by no means unintelligent, frequently make foolish statements, which doesn’t necessarily reflect their overall intelligence.

Lastly, let's touch on the "Merry Christmas" versus "Happy Holidays" debate that rolls around each festive season. The uproar over the use of "Xmas" is particularly mind-boggling. Most people aren't aware that the term dates back to 1485, and the "X" is not a secular substitution but the Greek letter "Chi," short for Christ. These trivial debates distract us from the spirit of the holiday season.

In conclusion, I'm just a sensitive guy trying to navigate a world that seems increasingly intolerant, judgmental, and hyper-sensitive. But as I toe the line at every race, and face each day with unwavering honesty, I must remember to hold onto my sense of compassion, tolerance, and respect for others' views. As we get closer to the end of the year, I wish you all an early “Merry Xmas”!